Hello, friends! I am so sorry it has been so long since I've been on here! Life got the hold of me, both for the better and the worse. There have been so much going on that I have lost a lot of focus and energy to write anything. Also, I was fresh out of ideas as well.

However, something came to me recently (aka, about 5 minutes ago). I have had a lot of things going on in my life, unfortunately not all that great. I'm struggling financially, productively, and emotionally. I cannot really accurately describe what exactly has been going on, but so many things have hit the fan that I felt like I was slowly losing control. I felt like all of a sudden, this massive storm cloud just came over my life, with one little one hanging over my head. 

Most people didn't really see it, but those close to me really noticed it. I am usually not very open when it comes to things going on in my life, but I do turn to my sister. She is younger than me, but she is wise beyond her years. She and I talked, and she instilled in me something that I knew I was struggling with, but didn't want to admit: I wasn't fully committing myself to God, only focusing on letting myself handle everything in my life and not giving it all to Him.

I was trusting myself and others to get whatever I needed done, and I wasn't letting God handle it. I was somewhat slipping, and God was taking things away from me and putting me through this hardship in order for me to fully recommit my life. Now, this was not like when I officially recommitted to God back in my freshman year of college, but this was more of a, "stop thinking you're gonna have everything handled out your way, let me do what I have planned for you". 

So, that night, I sat in my room, and cried out to God, asking him to take full control of everything going on in my life. I asked him to build in me strength to face my struggles, and to let me not forget that He will always be there for me, and that these trials are here for a reason that I do not even fully comprehend why yet. I promise you, I felt God's hand of protection over me that night, comforting me, letting me know that He wasn't going anywhere. 

This season in my life has taught me so much. What can really be summed up by my experience these past few weeks is in 1 Peter. It says,

I have so many trials that I have faced in this short period of time, but I know now that: 1)  I have to fully let go of trials in my life and let God take the reigns, and 2) God has put these trials in my life for a reason. He knows what's going to happen tomorrow, next week, and within these next years of my life. I just have to stop being a stubborn bum and just let God work in my life.

Have you guys ever let God handle a situation you originally wanted to on your own? How did that turn out? I love hearing about how God is working through people's lives! It's such a blessing!

Yours truly,

Leighan